I was idling some time on Facebook putting in names of people and seeing if they were the ones I know and when I checked against Jason I found that the one on the bike was him. Maybe it was a bit stupid to contact him again, raising his hopes that something would happen. I know that last time we met he bored me with his boasting and outrageous stories which may or may not be true so why was I getting in touch again? I suppose because I was bored maybe which is not a good enough reason.
Anyway we arranged to meet for lunch yesterday and after much debating arrived at the Hare which was a big mistake. Very busy with half of the town in there including his secretary which actually is not a problem its only lunch afterall.
Trouble is that I do find him boring. He boasts about doing horrible things to people for some kind of revenge or other. Or boasts of leaving ex girl friends who are suicidal and just calling and ambulance and never bothering to find out if they are alive or dead or not. He describes lots of incidents where he gets the better of someone or other such as calling rentokill to someone's house who has a mole on their neck!! Setting fires just for the fun of it when he was younger. He talks in the language of revenge and anger at the world, of not caring about others. Of having enough money not to have to worry about anyone else.
I talk in the language of win win, of trying to understand people's motives of still perhaps niavely wanting to make the world a more comfortable place for all and so his anger which is spoken in the most calm and measured of tones makes me feel uncomfortable and all I want to to is escape his presence. At the time I think I am bored but the reality is that I am extremely uncomfortable and looking for a reason to leave.
After the lunch I go off to my appointment and he sends a couple of texts saying he would like to meet again where we can talk more openly as it felt a bit overheard in the pub and that I looked good and sorry if he went on a bit and next time he promises it to be fun. I keep my reply light and non commital and later when I check for his email I cannot find it and so worry its been sent to the other person with the same name as me who also works for the council!!
Now how to be rid of this person. First thing is to never contact him no matter how bored I might be. Second is to just put him off gently. I don't need any big confrontation and he'll never believe that its his personality that is putting me off. He'll want to think that it is something in me so its best I let him continue to think that. I think he can think that I want a celebate lifestyle, that I am going all philisophical and will remain distant friends.
The incident did leave me feeling grateful for the upfront Mr V and I text him saying how much I appreciated him, to which of course he had no understanding and said I was funny!! Ah if only he knew.
What a curious life, two men met at roughly the same time and still involved in my life in different kinds of ways...a random meeting in a pub.
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